by Teresa Greenleaf In India living with relatives after marriage is a custom that is observed in large numbers of families even nowadays. This tradition originated based on the Vedas back in the 2nd – 1st century BC. It is believed that after marriage, the husband takes responsibility for the woman instead of her father. Accordingly, she moves to his family. Despite the strong historical tradition, modern values often provoke many conflicts.
5 reasons why living with relatives is a bad idea
Another way of housekeeping
Each house has its own rules: when the cleaning takes place, who cooks, and when the day off is. Your spouse’s family has probably a certain routine for more than 20 years. You have only 2 options: reconcile or arrange a revolution.
Personal space
Living with a large number of relatives in a small house with thin walls may be a real test of your patience.
Personal freedom
You may even have to change your daily routine or clothing style under the pressure of a new family. When your every move is under the scrutiny of your husband’s relatives, it causes stress.
Life with a child
Clash of generations, constant persistent recommendations for raising a child – be ready for tons of moralizing.
Live with older relatives
Although caring for elderly parents is considered a sacred duty in India, this will result in you having to sacrifice your interests and time. However, not everything is so terrible. With the right approach, you can create an “independent” life, even living with relatives. Use common sense, empathy and determination.
Our tips for you on how to live in peace with in-laws after marriage
Positive thinking
Initially, do not treat your relatives as opponents. On the contrary, always think that your relatives are here to support you, and you will have a wonderful relationship for the rest of your life. This will help you ignore some flaws.
Find your personal space
It is very important. In the living room, in the bedroom or the park near the house – you should have a place for privacy.
Contribute to the family
Whenever possible, try to help your relatives with the daily routine. This is a great way to earn a good attitude. For example, you can offer to cook breakfast for all once a week.
Do not interfere in the family problems of your relatives
When you see a heated debate that does not concern you, it is best to stay away from it. Accepting parties will unnecessarily create an imbalance in your relationship with your husband and your relatives.
Personal time
You must have personal time with your spouse. Weekly walks and periodic trips out of town should be the norm.
Set your boundaries
You need to indicate what is acceptable for you and what is not. When you think you are being mistreated, you should first discuss this with your husband and let him handle it for you. If your husband does not support you, you must fight for your rights.
You will need a large dose of sympathy, a sense of humor and common sense for staying with in-laws after marriage!
